Lamps can't actually be gay, can they?
by I-write-hurt-not-comfort
Summary: The aftermath of when Elliot and Leo smoked a joint before Chemistry, and Oz had to babysit them (sequel to @nawnomschnuff's fic "Gay lamps") / contains drugs, smoking and leo being crude


_**(A/Ns: so this is a sequel to jack's (nawnomschnuff) fic swap to me called "Gay lamps" on AO3, in which Elliot and Leo get high. sorry it's a little late. oh, and because im a British fucker and feel like i should specify, cigarette = fag.**_

 _ **content warnings: references to drug use, smoking, it's very gay okay, swearing.**_

 _ **disclaimer: i do not own pandora hearts)**_

* * *

 **Lamps can't actually be gay, can they?**

When Elliot woke up, he didn't remember where he was at first.

First of all, his head hurt. Well, it didn't exactly _hurt_. There was more just a relentless pressure weighing him down, like his brain had turned to a brick. Along with this was an uncomfortable churning in his stomach, for which he couldn't quite distinguish between hunger and nausea.

Something was tickling his neck, as well. And there appeared to be this weight on his left arm, tangled around his left leg and particularly pressing down on his left shoulder-

Leo. He turned his head, and sure enough, it was Leo, curled up to him and sleeping soundly.

Ok, but where _were_ they? This wasn't his bed, nor was it Leo's.

(... don't ask how he knew it wasn't Leo's.)

"Ah, you're awake now."

… that voice.

"Eurghhhh I took you two back to mine to rest. I didn't think you should go home to your parents like that…"

It was Oz, seemingly across the room at his desk, a book resting on his lip.

"Yeah…" Elliot tried to speak, his voice cracking. And the moment he tried to sit up, groggy and slow, his head throbbed, and he stomach turned.

Smoking pot was one of - if not _the_ worst decisions he had _ever_ made.

All the wanted to do was go back to _his_ house, eat, and eat some more. Oh, and smoke. Because, funnily enough, weed didn't really satisfy his need for nicotine, and now that he wasn't high anymore, that craving kicked right back into action.

He had two options here. One was to wait for Leo to wake up, and then leave with him. The other was to go home. But if he went home, there was no chance he'd be able to smoke. He already knew he'd be getting an earful from Vanessa for being home late, and there was no _way_ he was having that without having smoked first.

Of course, he _could_ smoke at Oz's, but Leo was technically the only person who knew he even smoked. And Oz had always held him to such high expectations, for some stupid reason, so confessing he was annoyingly hooked on cigarettes seemed almost embarrassing.

Just as that last thought crossed his mind, from beside him, Leo stirred. Then, a second later, he peeled himself away from Elliot, groggily dragging a hand through his hair.

"This isn't my bed," he screwed his face up. "Shit, I'm hungry."

"That's a change," Elliot grumbled under his breath. "You should be more used to this than me."

"Mhm, but my foster carer never gives me any food afterwards. She says it's my fault," Leo whined. "How're you holding up?"

"Well it's not weed I need…" Elliot said discreetly, gesturing to Oz. "He took us to his house."

Briefly, Oz waved at him.

"Oh, thanks," Leo said. "Do you have any food?"

"We're not staying here, Leo," Elliot rolled his eyes. _Clearly_ Leo wasn't getting the hint. "We're going home."

"Before you go, I need to talk to you about a few things." Oz dropped the pen, and stood up promptly. "You know, like… why?!"

Both Elliot and Leo sighed at each other in sync. This talk was inevitable.

"Fine, we'll talk!" Elliot gave in, clutching his blazer beside him, which he never even remembered taking off. "Just… can we go outside?"

Oz stared at him blankly. "Umm… why?"

Once again, Elliot rolled his eyes. "Are your- is your uncle home?" he asked, biting his tongue mid-sentence and having to remind himself that Oz didn't actually live with his parents.

"No."

"Good. I need a cigarette. Are you happy?!"

Elliot could just _tell_ Oz was judging him. "Seriously?"

"Yes, yes. I'm serious!"

"Alright," Oz simply threw his arms up, and staggered downstairs with the other two. He seemed exhausted, Elliot and Leo questioning what the hell had happened to upset him.

The moment they were in the garden, Elliot stuck a single cigarette between his lips, inhaling deeper than he could ever recall inhaling.

Ok, he really needed to cut back.

"What did you want?" he grunted, as Oz took a seat on one of the chairs.

Oz sighed. "What do you remember?"

"Hmm, well…" Leo immediately started grinning. "Elliot was desperate for-"

"I wasn't ' _desperate_ '," he denied immediately. "I just… needed a fag, and then… this _idiot_ just pulled out a _joint_!"

"Why the hell did you take it?!" Oz yelped, wrinkling his nose at the smell of cigarette smoke. "Haaah, never mind. What do you remember after that?"

"Hmm…" Leo thought allowed. "We tried to high-five a lamp because it was gay. Aha, so gay. Ah, it's about that point that my memory blanks, I'm afraid."

"I barely remember that…" Elliot grunted, dragging on the cigarette in a desperate attempt to resurface some memories.

"Do you remember outing yourselves to like, _the entire school?!_ Not to mention Leo daydreaming about piss, and you two almost screwing in Chemistry!"

"Ah, but Oz, I do remember you outing yourself as well," Leo snickered. "Come on, we've all shared secrets here. Elliot has shared with you that he's a little on the rebellious side with the smoking, and I've announced to the whole world that I have a piss kink. So Oz, tell us: you are, in fact, bisexual, right?"

Internally, Oz facepalmed; in actuality, he really hadn't expected them to remember that. "Well, yeah, but that's irrelevant!"

"It answers my question."

"You were more off in la-la-land that Elliot was!" Oz yelled, trying to wrap his head around what the hell had even happened. "Arghh, how do you remember stuff like that?!"

"Fufu, I lied," Leo chuckled. "Ah, Oz, you must remember I smoke pot a lot more than Elliot.

With those words ringing in his ears, Oz once again focused his view on Elliot, pacing back and forth in order to settle the insatiable nicotine cravings which didn't seem to be satisfied from just one cigarette.

Oz sighed, knocking his head against the table. "You two really are… something else."


End file.
